Review of Calvaire (2005) by Tristan G — 10 Sep 2007

Off The Walls. Wicked Scary and Twisted. One of My Favorite Horror Films.

A singer drives his car out into the middle of nowhere and his car gets stuck and breaks down. As he is sitting down, a strange looking man knocks on his window and asks if he has seen his dog anywhere. He tells him that he has not but that he needs some help with his car. The stranger takes him to a hotel where he falls asleep immediately. When he wakes up, he finds his car being moved and worked on by the owner of the hotel, who seems like a nice enough man. The two meet each other and learn a little bit about each other's backgrounds. The hotel owner begins to obsess over this man because his wife used to be a singer and he some how finds a very comfortable similarity between the two. The man tells him that he is going to take a walk, but the owner of the hotel warns him to not go into the village a little ways down the road. The viewer gets.

The idea that something sinister is involved with the people of the village and that the man does not want him to be exposed or involved with it.

While the man is gone, the hotel manager manages to rummage through some of his stuff and find several mysterious photos of what look like past lovers. And meanwhile, the man finds some of the members of the village hidden away in a strange barn type environment where they appear to be engaging in some strange sex ritual. Naturally, he runs off before he can discover what is really going on. Some time later, the man discovers the hotel owner destroying his car. Now a person would think that someone who was normal would not want to interact with a man with a sledgehammer, especially since he is destroying a car. That would just be crazy. But the man does, and is immediately hit in the head and knocked out cold. And from here on out, the film becomes a never ending nightmare full of relentless torture, sexual misconception, extreme unpredictability, and and blowing of the speakers. The sheer volume of the screaming is enough really make someone become hearing impaired if the film is at full volume. This is a scary film, because just when you think that the film couldn't possibly be more twisted and scary, it gets twice as much. The film is just unrelenting. I mean, it just won't stop. It keeps going and going and descending lower and lower into the depths of darkness. Try to imagine the maniacal rawness of THE TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE(1974) crossed with the characters of DELIVERANCE(1972) and the look and sound of Gasper Noe's IRREVERSIBLE(2003) and Seul contre tous(1998) and you'll have an idea of the off-the-wall style. after a while, you really wish the main character were dead.

The film starts off with an awkward vibe to begin with, with the singer doing a kind of high energy performer, and it doesn't really let up with that awkward and uncomfortable feel until the halfway mark where the film really lets loose. In fact, this film has one of my all time favorite sequences from a recent film. It's a scene in which members of a bar begin dancing with their partners like mindless zombies to a maniacal polka piano tune. The graphic violence is repugnant enough to keep a gore hound interested, but the whole emotional ordeal of the main character and the sheer unpredictability of the events are what the casual moviegoer will want to check this out for. But as for the horror fans, this is an absolute must-see. I highly recommend this Belgium masterpiece. It may not be original, but damn. It's scary as hell.