Review of Zombie Honeymoon (2004) by Jennifer O — 14 Nov 2007

A second viewing of [b]Planet Terror[/b] has made me lower my rating. I think I loved the movie far more the first time because of the experience of seeing a double feature with a great crowd.

It was a good little movie, but not great. Good, gross effects, a few cool people and performances, and then a few not-so-good things, like the fact that the leading actress is a crappy actress.

Quentin Tarantino and his ugly, hammy mug really bugged me. I think it would have been a solid 8 if not for him. YUCK, stay behind the camera.

I liked Marley Shelton A LOT, but those ridiculous "Babysitter Twins" were pathetic. And what was the point of Fergie being in it? Ugh.

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[b]Cat O' Nine Tails[/b] was more like a 6.5, but 7 works better than 6 here. Solid litle giallo about muders occuring at a research facility where the gene for criminal behavior may have been discovered. A blind puzzle maker and his little niece try to solve these murders with the help of a nosey reporter. I know, kind of silly, but it works.

Dario Argento effort without his rampant use of color or annoying Goblin music.

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[b]Mirrormask[/b] was an incredible disappointment. Beautiful, but empty. I don't have the heart to give it a bad rating, but I am saddened by this lost opportunity. I saw it about two weeks ago and I barely remember it. Sad.

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Zombie Honeymoon - an interesting failure that would have made for a cute, quirky horror comedy if it had been written and directed by a guy who would actually write and direct.

Harsh, I know, but this also feels like a lost opportunity.

A loving, slightly wild Jersey couple marries and honeymoons in a swanky house near the beach. In between the lovies (no graphic nudity here) there is surfing and sunning, and then tragedy strikes--a man walks out of the ocean and attacks the hubby, spewing vile black shit into his mouth before dying himself.

Danny is taken to the hospital and dies, but comes back with a taste for human flesh.

Could have been a good or even cute dark comedy, but the drama was laid on too thick, the humor spread out way too much, and it was thin to begin with, and a little too amateurish.

Then I felt bad when I saw that the writer had written this in honor of his sister who had lost her husband shortly after they'd married. Yes, I feel guilty for bashing this movie (and also because my sweetie got it for me and I didn't love it) but I have to be honest. It wasn't that good at all.

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And it's 4:00 a.m. and I'm tired.