Review of War of the Worlds (2005) by Joel — 25 Aug 2005

Guess the consensus is more than obvious, but nowhere near as grossly unsubtle as the terrible movie itself. Zero thrills. As far as I can tell, the only supple horror you'll find is how much it plays out like what I'm sure is the 'reinvented' 21st century Spielberg's and that phony Cruise's brainstorm of 'cinematic transcendence'.

Hopefully anyone who *hasn't* seen this simplistic, childish mess yet still isn't tempted, it's really about on par with something like The Core, or a DTV effort. Mind-bogglingly stupid, blandly limp and unriveting from start to finish, with 'scripting', 'special' effects and 'performances' to match.

How could anyone behind the scenes or upfront be proud of this garbage or their 'efforts' is beyond me. But I guess it's to be expected, though even the 1953 version of this nonsense source-material can only register as skillful and timely by comparison.

Spielberg's always been immensely overrated if you ask me, it's just no contest. The Indy films are yawn-inducing amateurish crap, every last one - if you want enjoyably throwaway, you want old Looney Tunes shorts, not feature films.

While other supposed renowned favorites, i.e. E.T., Close Encounters, Empire of the Sun, Jurassic Park, Saving Private Ryan, Schindler's List, despite likable qualities, are just too humanly sketchy, and seriously lack enough oomph overall to qualify as remotely great.

The remainder of his oeuvre is largely hideous and/or worthless. Even Jaws, his best film by a country mile, clearly ranks somewhere at the very bottom of a list of other superior directors' best films.

And now, does Spielberg even care anymore, or is he just a bigger, more laughably earnest joke of a director than I ever thought he was? Retirement is in dire order. At least five out of six Star Wars are indeed similarly, grandiosely dumb and unsophisticated as a box of rocks, sure - but at least *amusing* in their sheer badness; re: attempts to take themselves seriously.

Unlike.....THIS.