Review of The Mist (2007) by Connor B — 07 Aug 2015

Giving this a star at all in and of itself irritates me, but I had to so I could write this review. Certainly, the movie had a decent budget but after I wasted two hours and five minutes of my live watching this god-awful piece of baboon shit on my television I realised the writer ought to have his fucking hands cut off. David escapes with a group of people, including his son and they manage to drive off in his car. Once they run out of gas, he kills his son with a gun they had and the remaining survivors, but he doesn't kill himself because they don't have enough bullets. As soon as he steps out of the car, he begins begging to die and pleads for monsters to come kill him. Then, a tank rolls out of the mist and they day is saved. David collapses to his knees, begins screaming, and then everything cuts to black harder than a shitty Sopranos remake.

This movie deserves to be put in a place so foul no one would dare touch it.

In fact, so awful I chose to cancel my Amazon Premium Subscription, because I'm astonished that what I once deemed an amazing service would even dare show me an F movie so poorly written that it was clearly conceived in the fever dreams of a man who most likely spends his days longing for deaths cold grip.

Fuck you, I'm out.