Review of The Lovely Bones (2009) by Leo G — 14 Sep 2013

First let me say that I really respect Peter Jackson as a director. I think he's got a great eye for visuals and is one of the better storytellers of our time. That said, this movie only features the former. It has INCREDIBLY imaginative visuals, but basically nothing in the way of plot or characters. All of the dialogue is very contrived, and there's basically nothing to it that I found intriguing. Adding to its flaws is an overall feeling of exhausting pretentiousness and a 2:15 running time. If this movie just thought less of itself, it could be fun. But seeing as it apparently thinks it's exposing revelations about the afterlife or whatever, it just comes off as holier-than-thou bullshit.

I'm not a fan of Mark Wahlberg, and he's no better or less bland here than he was in Ted. But he's not to be singled out, as the other actors don't really put much effort in either. This might have been acceptable from another director, but the guy who did the LORD OF THE RINGS TRILOGY? Come on. Give your actors some motivation. As for the story, it seems more like a children's book with a lot of pictures than a feature film. Also, that bitch from The Host was in this. So that's a point deduction right there.

THE LOVELY BONES OFFICIAL KEANU SCORE: 2/10. The visuals are imaginative, but even with them, the story lacks meaning and purpose. And sometimes, the visual effects are so clearly CGI, it detracts from the story and even looks fake. Altogether, this is a really big disappointment for anyone who was a fan of the LOTR movies, and a big setback for this director in general. It's almost impossible to sit through.