Review of The Glimmer Man (1996) by Luke P — 23 Aug 2008

Do you ever watch a film and wonder if a strong gust of wind blew vital pages of the script away, leaving the cast and crew to film what was left, regardless of it making sense? Well, oddly-titled The Glimmer Man is one of those films.

It starts well enough, as a Seven-style serial killer is crucifying local families, earning himself the moniker of The Family Man. From there though it all goes tits up. Characters come and go, subplots build and then disappear, while scenes come and go with no thematic connection.

Seagal kinda does what you'd expect (wearing some bizarre and garish clothes) spouting Buddhist philosophy and lazily kicking ass (this is the start of his fat period), while Keenen Ivory Wayans is the Riggs to his Murtaugh (although nowhere near as good), saddled with the obligatory wisecracks from a dreadfully unfunny script, and come the end your left wishing he was the slightly funnier Damon Wayans.

That's basically what this is, a lesser version of The Last Boy Scout, except without Willis, Shane Black's script and Tony Scott's direction. My advice? Watch The Last Boy Scout instead (and if someone can tell me why this is called The Glimmer Man, I would really like to know).