Review of Star Wars: The Last Jedi (2017) by Albert B — 01 Feb 2018

1/2 star and reviews of " Not Interested " Not included in RT totals.

I came back to update my review to one star to make sure my comment counts for something.... or I hope it counts.

If you are less 1 star in your review you might want to consider pushing it up to 1 star... nor that it deserves it.

I do not know what is worse the RT inflated score of 48% ... or the media / Kathleen Kenedy and Ryan J trying make me think I have missed some incredible life building message in this shit movie..and that ..for not liking the movie I must be 2 steps below full retard ! Or that the only people that do not like this movie must be racists and hate to see women in powerful roles. This seems to be the opinion of Kathleen K and Ryan J.

Yup, ok fine.... maybe that would wash if it was only white angry men making reviews. but take a look in youtube, and you see every ethenicity, young, old, women and men all making comments about why they hate this movie. They by far, out number the positive reviews.

I am starting to care less and less to be honest. The spin from Kathleen K, Ryan J and disney makes me cringe, and is insulting to say the least.

Anyway.

How any thinking person, can give this movie 4 or 5 stars, is beyond me. If you do not think, and do not care if a movie has any connection to its past / history / previous timeline ...I guess this movie is for you... and great... more power to you. But when I go to see a movie in a trillogy I like to see it connect at least in part, to what came before it.

This movie does not, it is horrible story telling, and removes much of what was previous for no reason. It does not answer any questions from TFA , and the few it does were lack luster. And the story continuity is a crazy mess.

It has been 2 years since the Force Awakens, but in the movie The Last jedi only a few days have passed. And so much has changed that it makes the story ....just crazy.

There is so much wrong with this movie, and so little right with it it is diffcult to know where to start first.

The story...such as it is is nonsenical, written terribly, and is full of so many errors and inconsistencys with the time lines that it makes watching it difficult.

Some glaring things I found insulted my inteligence or tossed out old star wars lore.

1) C3P0... from TFA to TLJ the timeline is only a few days, maybe a week from the destruction of the First order star killer base. The resistance / rebelion is under sige... but in all this chaos someone decided to find C3P0 a new matching arm ? ( arm was red in TFA ) This was more important than...I dont know....? suriving the battles with the first order ? " Oh my god were going to die ! But...wait ! C3P0 !....I know your left arm is ok, and it functions... but I cant stand the color....go down to maintence and get a new one to match your other arm! " Is this what has happened amidst all the chaos ??

2) Rey and Luke.... In TFA, when Rey is handing the saber to Luke she has tears in her eyes. In TLJ... the tears are gone, her composure is much different.

****None of you 5 star review people notice any of this ??*****.

Lack of attention to details, and poor story continuation. This is part 8 yes? it is a continuation of part 7.... Glaring errors.

3) As has been noted, the humor was stupid, Hux and Poe the telephone call was idiotic, and after that you could not take any of the first order officers as serious characters. Humor in bad moments, when the flight deck is destroyed, and all the resistance pilots are killed... save for Poe... Instead of having a moment of grief for the audience.. BB8 bounces in with the stupid beeping " Dont worry kids ! I am okay !, See I am alive!...Everyone else is dead BUT!!! Me, the cute robot !, I lived ! Dont feel bad for the other people.... I am still here ! ".

Shit writing, shit humor.

4) The timeline for TLJ is only a few days from when the resistance destroyed the first order star killer base from TFA..... In that time the resistance now has become a shadow of its former self, no support, no money, no people, no ships....nada. They have been fighting for 40 years, saved the galaxy from Darth Vader, the Emperor, they destroyed 2 death stars and the first order planet killer ....and have no support from the galaxy of people they have been saving " Oh yeah.... thanks for saving my planet from being blown up... but money ? ...support?? ..umm...well you know times are tough..sorry cant help you... " Seriously ??! What the fuck do these people need to do to have some help from the galaxy they have been saving ?? At the end of the movie...the Rebelion / Resistance now..less 400 people, no ships, no nada...and the big plan is to hide behind a big metal door, and send out a message saying " Help ! " ...WTF ?....seriously ?! If no one wanted to help the resistance at its best, no one would be coming when they are at their worst. This is over the top stupidity.

Just 100% shit writing, lazy writing.

5) Rose and Fin. Underdevoped characters brought in ..it seems for comic relief. Casino planet was a complete waste of time complete waste of time. The characters were dull, the scene with rose and Fin at the end was 100% stupid. Rose saving Fin...but in doing so more or less condems the last of the resitance ( AND !!! Rose and Fin ! ) to death from the first order ! They crash in front of the first order walkers... miles from the rebel base... but mananage to walk back before the walkers can get there....and without getting shot at !....WTF were the ATAT crews doing ? Watching the budding love romance of Rose and Fin and the kiss....? This is just beyond stupid......

And Chewie and R2D2, C3P0, Akbar...wow...iconic characters with almost no screen time.

***5 star review people.....all of this sits okay with you ? Seriously ?? This is a 5 star movie ?

did you not think of any of this ? *****.

6) The force now....teaches you everthing you need to know. Training ??! Who the fuck needs training ?! Not Rey ! She knows everything, including how to best a jedi master ! And certainly not the kid at the end of the movie, moving his broom in ways that took Aniken years to master !

Lazy shit writing, that in moments destroys all the old lore and history of the past movies.

7) Luke...the man that can find good in Darth Vader, spare his life... now at some moment of weakness....is going to kill his nephew, his sisters and his best friends son...Because !!! He has dark thoughts...? Seriously ? WTF ! Did the idiot writer not read a book, or see any of the previous movies ? What ?! This is good writing ? this is good character developement ? This is ...new and fresh ? This is " exciting changes to the characters ?! " Are you for real ?? And Lukes map ?...okay...why did he leave a map if he had no desire to be found?? ! It is beyond stupid, and a waste of an iconic character. And Lukes saber....his fathers old lightsaber...given to him by Ben Kenobi...and lost ( with his right hand!) On Bespin in cloud city.... Luke could care less , right? No questions like " where the hell did you find this ?! " Seriously....we are expected to buy into this ?

And.... what did Luke do, or say when he found out about Ben ( kylo ) killing his Father Han Solo ? Nothing ! A small change in expression..and thats it. The man that saved his life many times, his best friend, his sisters husband.... he did and said... nothing......

***You people giving 5 stars....did you not notice any of this ? Or you just could not give a shit ? How can any of you say " Wow this is the best of the star wars movies ! I love it I have seen it 3 times ! Dont listen to the negative reviews its great ! " Seriously...WTF! ****.

8) Leia..okay...wow, just wow........never using the force for anything, cant use the force to find Luke....But in one moment when she is sucked into the vacume of space, she can become the most powerful jedi or sith that has ever lived before or since?! Wow... more shit writing, just for have a extra movie subplot? Or what?

*** 5 star review people,,,enlighten all of us, by saying how and why you thought this is ok... please! Most of us have no fucking clue why they would do this. ****.

9) Reys parentage... ok we had to wait 2 years for the big back story of " sorry your parents were dead beat drunks " Ok and fine, but this could have been built up much different. what a waste of a good potential story line.

Lazy writing.

10) Snoke.... dont know where he came from, how he took over power, who trained him...nada. There is no mention of his name in any of the previous movies, books, cartoons nothing. A character with no backstory, killed off.

**** 5 star reiew people...this is all ok with you, yes ? Thumbs up and all that ? Did this not make you wonder why the hell Snoke was even in the movie ? ***.

11, The big space chase. The first order... they are so stupid...as to not send ships out in front to blockade the resistance ? It was impossible to think of the first order with any degree of seriousness.

And bombs falling....in space....? Air in space...you can breath in space now? Sometimes there is a vacum...sometimes no....? What... ? And ....hyperdrives as a weapon now ? Why did someone not think to make hyperdrive bombs I mean ...why not ?

Wow....

12) And Yoda....wow... now he is almost a god. He can command lightning to destroy things and is all powerful. Where the fuck was he, if he was so powerful to give Luke some tutoring, when he was teaching his students?' Where was Obi Wan ? They let him fuck up with his students, and basicaly from that mistake with Ben the first order rises up.... And Old Ben and Yoda ..they leave Luke to be depressed on the island...? But ! Yoda decides to come out of ...hiding when rey arrives?... What ? And tell Luke the old jedi books are no longer important, and then uses the force to command lightning burn the old books ? Seriously ?

****5 star review people...This is good writing? this is entertaining ? ...Did none of this make you think "WTF ?" Obviously not.....

13) The Knights of Ren are....where ? Anyone know ?

***Maybe the 5 star review people know? I know I dont have a clue, but for many of the 5 star review crowd this was not important. ****.

14) Kylo Ren and Fin, at the end of TFA are both very injured, now, a few days later in TLJ... they are ok ? Kylo was cut down hard, and shot and Fin was almost dead from being cut down with a lightsaber...? This is maybe 1 week ( or less) after the end of TFA.

*** 5 star review people, care to comment on this ?? ***.

15) Sub plots with no point, misplaced humor, no character development or very poor use of characters. Captain Phasma, Adm Akbar..what a waste.

16) Social messages...... we need this in a star wars movie ? Men are evil, or stupid or both. Rich people are all bad and cant be trusted...? This last part I find almost funny, coming from people like Kathleen Kennedy and the Disney executives...These people make more money in 1 week than most people will see in 5 lifetimes... but, obviosly they do not consider themselves as rich / wealthy ....?

18) Why did a droid not pilot the ship in its suicide run ? Or...autopilot ? Droids have more value than a living being ? Or ...was purple hair commander not able to think about this ? We needed one more heroic death ?

19) Admiral Akbar....after 40 + years service to the rebelion / resitance...his character is quite literaly tossed out the window.... Not even a " Thanks much ! " Again, what a horrible send off to a loved character.

The story, the writting, the plot, seriously, think about it...it is horrible. How anyone can see this movie...even as a stand alone movie...not as a star wars movie, and give it a 5 star review blows my mind.

" Let the past die...kill it if you must ".

Yup ! Similar to Akbar...I think this is what Disney intentions are for the 40 years of fans of the movies . " We dont need or want you any more...fuck off ! ".

I can go one and on, and on, as to why this movie is so terrible, just as so many other people have. it is a shit movie, on its own it is a shit movie, as a star wars movie it is a disgrace.

Honestly...I think Disney and Kathleen Kennedy must think .

" All the star wars fans are stupid, and they will buy into anything we want and will not notice any changes. They are to stupid to know or care what we do with the movies, they will go and pay the money and not care because !! Its Star wars !".

I am a life long fan, but after the TFA, I was not expecting to much. All I wanted was to see a good star wars story... and this is not it. It was a wasted opportunity.

I give 1 star for good visuals and music,but realy this should be expected from a star wars movie. But the rest of the movie is trash.