Review of San Andreas (2015) by Shpostal — 06 Jun 2015
I love my wife and it's only because of that fact that I was willing to see any movie with Dwayne Johnson, who makes Keanu Reeves look like he's overacting by comparison. There's a reason they call crap like "San Andreas" disaster movies, and it has nothing to do with earthquakes or tidal waves.
Hideously horrible acting and an even worse script guarantee this will be a stinker worthy of Mystery Science Theater. Yes, the special effects were done pretty well, but computer animation does all the work nowadays, and how hard is it to screw up demolition? If you want to see a city suffer, watch the most recent Godzilla movie. That had the lighting and fear down pat, where this flick was about as moving as watching a leaf fall off a tree. So that being said, here's what I'd rather do than EVER go to a Dwayne Johnson movie again:
Be held without charges in a Libyan jail.
Lie in state.
Listen to an accountant's lecture at a convention.
Jump into a pool full of wet cat food.
Listen to nothing but Bob Dylan for 24 hours without a break.
This review of San Andreas (2015) was written by Shpostal on 06 Jun 2015.
San Andreas has generally received mixed reviews.
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