Review of Equals (2015) by Eileen S — 14 Jul 2016

Bella and the Beast reenact the Twilight saga on the set of THX-1138. I have to admit that I really wanted to like this because A24 productions have made some of the best films this year. "Equals" proves to be an outstanding exception to an otherwise impressive roster.

It seems that since Nathan Parker and Duncan Jones parted ways as writer and director of 2009's "Moon", they both have gone on, seven years later, to both crap out some worthless dollops in the cinematic bucket.

Surprisingly however, this film manages to be worse than "Warcraft" simply by being so similar to "Twilight". Not only does it star Kristen Stewart who looks exquisitely nauseous and depressed constantly, but the film is in an unrelenting, dim-lit blue hue.

We can't leave out the fact that it is based on a romance that is not meant to be but somehow works out beyond the disturbing parameters of the film's universe. Also, the majority of the action is people staring at each other and being sad.

The deeper themes of missing the trees for the forest or losing humanity due to better living through chemistry are nebulous and simply give these otherwise boring dystopian caricatures something to mumble to each other amidst the Yamaha DX7 vocal swells.

Luckily, I didn't pay any money to see this film, but I wish I could get a refund for the time spent.