Review of Blended (2014) by Patrick L — 05 Sep 2014

"While Sandler and Barrymore seem to be having great time in Africa, we get stuck with a juvenile and unfunny romantic comedy".

Movie Review: Blended.

Date Viewed: May 23 2014.

Directed By Frank Coraci (The Wedding Singer, Click, The Waterboy and Zookeeper).

Written By Clare Sera and Ivan Menchell.

Starring: Adam Sandler, Drew Barrymore,.

Wendi McLendon-Covey, Shaquille O'Neal,.

Bella Thorne, Terry Crews, Emma Fuhrmann,.

Alyvia Alyn Lind, Dan Patrick, Kevin Nealon,.

Abdoulaye N'Gom and Joel McHale.

It's official, I have lost faith in Adam Sandler. He can't make funny movies anymore. Beware every living creature in Africa, not only do you have Sandler to worry about, you should also look out for Terry Crews, the most deadly and annoying African singer in movie history. He's an even worst singer than my language arts teacher. His latest comedy "Blended" reunites his "Wedding Singer" and "50 First Dates" co-star Drew Barrymore. They may have great chemistry together but even they are not enough to save "Blended" from becoming a contender on to my list of the Worst Movies of 2014.

Sandler stars as Jim Friedman, a single father of three daughters, one of them is named Espn. Wow, named after his favorite sports channel, how original Adam, how original. We're told that his wife died of cancer. I'll bet his wife probably told him, "Are you f$&@ing crazy!", "You name your daughter ESPN!". Jim also works at Dick's Sporting Goods and his best friend is a co-worker named Doug (Shaquille O'Neal). Yes, in any Adam Sandler movie, there will always be product placement. The filmmakers should have put a small 10-second commercial saying, "This movie is brought to you by Dick's Sporting Goods". Anyways, Jim goes on a blind date with Lauren (Barrymore) who is also a single parent. They have dinner at Hooters and their date turns into a disaster.

Meanwhile, Lauren's sister Jen (Wendi McLendon-Covey, of "Bridesmaids") has just broken up with her billionaire boyfriend Dick (Dan Patrick). Dick was going to take Jen on vacation to Africa for a week and when she doesn't want to go, Lauren asks her if she and her two sons can go instead. Dick also happens to be Jim's boss and somehow Dick manages to sell his vacation to Jim, meaning that he and his three daughters are going to Africa too. Once they get to Africa, Jim, Lauren and their kids suddenly bump into each other. Soon, the hotel manager Mfana (Abdoulaye N'Gom) tells Jim and Lauren that they will have to sleep in their adult room and their kids will have to sleep in one extravagant bedroom.

Just when you think "Blended" couldn't get any worse, Jim and Lauren also meet Eddy (Kevin Nealon) and his slutty wife (Jessica Lowe). I can't believe the makers of "Blended" thought that casting Lowe was a great idea. It's a devastatingly unfunny performance and believe it or not, she's even worse than Kate Upton. Sandler and Barrymore had great chemistry in "The Wedding Singer" and "50 First Dates" but here they are wasted in a lifeless romantic comedy directed by Frank Coraci who previously worked with them in "The Wedding Singer" 16 years ago. The worst thing about this movie is it's portrayal of Africa, everybody in the hotel is beyond stupid and we get stock shots of giraffes, elephants and rhinos running into the wild.

The kid actors are terrible and the screenplay by Clare Sera and Ivan Menchell doesn't make a shred of sense. Sandler, I just want you to be a grown up for once and star in good movies again because otherwise you'll get more Razzie nominations. Also, the marketing for "Blended" is massively misleading, based on the the trailers, parents are going to think that this a family movie. Parents everywhere you are wrong, "Blended" has masturbation jokes and two rhinos having sex. It was just painful to sit through but at least it had romance compared to "The Big Wedding".