Review of Zatoichi: Darkness Is His Ally (1989) by Christopher B — 13 Aug 2016

- Do. Not. Fuck. With. Blind. Samurai.

- Apparently, the women are badasses too. A guitar player just garrotted someone.

- Protip: Don't insult the mafia when they're standing right in front of you.

- 4 folks with hoes in a field hoe in time to the soundtrack. Interesting.

- Paper lanterns with candles inside apparently are a common, and not flammable, thing.

- Best line: "Oh he's the neighbor's son. He's quite mad I'm afraid.".

- That was a pretty neat trick. He is really fast.

- If you are that fast, you can prevent someone from drawing their sword by running towards them & body blocking them. Interesting.

- Paper lanterns with fire inside still work unhindered in the rain. What sorcery is this?

- Creepy. They painted eyeballs on his closed eyelids so he wouldn't look blind.

- You can hide a dagger in the neck of a guitar.

- Houses made of wood, straw & paper burn really fast.

- Aaaaand he just cleanly sliced a stone lantern in half.

- These 4 guys hoeing...they keep popping up. Dancing in the field, now hammering a house together. It's like Blue Man Group.

- "Shoes" apparently are chunks of wood strapped to the feet with rope. Colored rope, but still...rope.

- And they're dancing up a storm in these "shoes". A combination of tap & Riverdance.

- OMG, it's the entire cast dancing! Like at the end of a musical! Sweet!

- Ok. It was 2 hours long, lots of blood, and some very sad plot points. But it was a good movie.