Review of Wrong Turn 2: Dead End (2007) by Benjamin J — 25 Aug 2010

Based on characters from the films The Hills Have Eyes, The Hills Have Eyes 2 and Texas Chainsaw Massacre, stolen and reused, this film is a pile of cock made worse by the awful acting of Henry Rollins. (OK, you were in Black Flag- an alright punk band whose legacy is better than their actual musical output. You did the shouty "I'm a Liar" song and had that awful TV show where did get to interview Werner Herzog, albeit in a clumsy and badly researched manner- but that doesn't give you the right to think you can make movies left, right and centre. You're really fucking bad).

Anyway, a bunch of inbred hillbillies decide to kill and eat a variety of cliches. There's a goofy skater guy who just makes dick jokes, a token sexy butch latino army lady (played by someone other than Michelle Rodriguez for a change), a slutty media hungry girl, an oh-so misunderstood emo girl, a jock with a heart, and a slightly frigid lass who you don't really mind seeing bumped off. They all venture into the forest and die one by one until the film ends.

The sequel does the old trick of explaining the origins of the killers to us because they think it 1) adds depth and 2) makes things scarier. Neither is ever the case, especially as they went for the standard "chemicals in the water" angle. With this new knowledge, we watch Rollins fight his way through the undergrowth, reciting his lines like he was reading them from an eye test chart and saying comedy pay offs that don't really make sense. The teens run around in various states of undress/blood soakness until the film decides to round itself off and let us go and do something productive.

Having read other reviews on here and noticing that they all give it 3 stars or above, I have reconsidered my opinion. Not my opinion on the film (nothing will change that) but my opinion on mass programmes of sterilisation.

An awful awful film for awful awful people.