Review of Vertical Limit (2000) by Vince K — 17 Aug 2009

Chris O'Donnel, better known as "Box Office Poison", stars in this exciting film about a daring moutain climbing rescue. Mountain climbing is stupid, it's so fucking dangerous and scary.

What the hell do these people think they're doing up there? It's like, "Look at me, I climbed to the top of this mountain and almost died!" So what, you think you're better than me or something? The opening scene is great, when brother and sister (Chris O'Donnel and Robin Tunney) are climbing up the face of this mountain in Utah with their dad, and 2 amateur climbers above them fall and they all get tangled in line together.

When the 2 climbers fell to their death I laughed my fucking ass off! They were all screaming and flailing their arms around; it was so funny! Then their dad makes them cut the rope so he dies - cut to scene of his body slamming on the ground! LOL Shoot to three years later and they're both in the Himaylas, K2 or something, and she accompanies a billionaire (Bill Paxton), on a climb.

Bad weather leads to an avalanche and they fall in a cave with Agent Krychek from the X-Files. So, of course, Chris O'Donnel leads a team up there to save them, armed with explosives to detonate the mountain to get at them (like that's not going to kill everyone).

Scott Glenn plays a crazy old man as their guide, with something to prove, and Bill Paxton turns into an evil asshole who is hogging all the adema shots for himself. This adema thing is awful, maybe you really shouldn't climb 23,000 feet in below zero weather, no matter how much you want to.

To save 3 people, most of them die, but it's worth it save Robin Tunney because she's just the cutest. I loved the scene where the explosion turns 2 climbers in red paint as the AVALANCHE OF FIRE comes sideways at them.

I slow-moed it, they liquify in a red blur; hilarious. Anyways, totally thrilling and awesome movie. Isn't Chris O'Donnel homeless now?