Review of Troll 2 (1990) by Jim P — 23 Nov 2013

It is difficult to estimate the importance of Troll 2 in movie history....for several reasons in fact. First and foremost it foretold the vegetarian and vegan revolution that would eventually sweep the nation. It was a warning we now wish we had heeded. I fear for my children being attacked by little anti-meat goblins and keep bologna readily available in my home. And who could have predicted the rise of "The Devil's Drink".....coffee. The residents of Nilbog wouldn't have imagined how addicted to Starbucks we've become.

Secondly, the personality of George Hardy was introduced to the world. This important event in cinema lore has to be witnessed. I can't explain it in a movie review. Suffice it to say his scene carrying little Joshua through the house rhapsodizing the merits of hospitality has to be viewed over and over. It's that good.

Also the brilliance of Troll 2, and this can't be overstated, is the irrelevance of a film's title. I finally understand that you can call a movie whatever you want and still create a masterpiece. I am thinking of making a movie about cyborgs taking over a tractor pull and monster truck rally before infiltrating Washington politics and calling it The Many Loves Of Allison. Or Possibly a love story at a nursing home where aliens leave pods that cause the elderly to become young again and call it DIABEETUS 3. The Title doesn't matter. It's the story that will draw in an audience. But whatever I or anyone else creates in the world of cinema it probably won't achieve the mind-blowing brilliance of Troll 2.