Review of The Transformers: The Movie (1986) by Movie G — 23 Aug 2011

In honour of the new Transformers: Dark Of The Moon (Or Dark Side Of The Moon as I keep accidentally calling it), here's a review of the original Transformers movie, possibly the greatest piece of 80s nostalgic cinema ever made.

Well everybody seems to hate Transformers now. Why? I can agree Michael Bay is an awful director but I never thought the movies themselves were that bad. Well for anyone still looking for a little hope that there is ever going to be a good Transformers movie, you've wasted years waiting because it existed all along with 1986's Transformers: The Movie, a relitively ignored movie upon it's release, but nowadays stands the test of time as a terrific animated movie, and the best Transformers film ever made.

Set in the year 2005 (I don't remember any of this happening!), Transformers is about the ongioing war between the Autobots and the Decepticons, now in full swing, when a giant, planet devouring Transformer named Unicron (awesome name) comes along and threatens the whole race, in its quest for The Matrix, the force that can help it control the universe. Our main character of Hot Rod comes along as the cocky, young kid with a lot to learn, before finally realizing only he can save the world and he must step up, grow up, and learn to face his enemies. Now the plot may seem a little out there for most, but that's the point. Not everybody is going to like this movie, only people who like Transformers. People nowadays seem to have a real problem with understanding demographics nowadays, and I think that's why a lot of movies get bad heat. I see a lot of people on here trying to be sophisticated reviewers and reviewing everything they see, and they end up giving movies like this, or Pokemon, or some other childish cartoon low ratings because they think it sucks. Well of course you don't like it, it was made for kids! And that's the thing with this movie. People who love Transformers will adore it, and people who don't will absoultely hate it, you've just got to decide which group you are in.

Transformers is an animated film, but don't let that tear you down on it. It's actually one of the most dazzling and spectacular pieces of hand drawn film I've ever seen. All the battles look terrific, the backgrounds all have this haunting, apocalyptic feeling to them, and the characters are all vibrant and colourful. The sequence where Unicron turns all of the disposed Decipticons into their new forms, like Megatron to Galvatron, is actually one of the coolest animated sequences I've ever seen, watch it with the lights off, it's pretty amazing. Another thing I love about Transformers is that's it just screams 80s everywhere. From the bright colours, neon lighting, and all of the animation style in general, it's awesome.

The same can be said for the music. It pretty muich consists of 2 main things. The first is a synthesized score written by Vince DiCola who is best known for writing the synth score to Rocky IV. I love it. It's so moody and sinister sounding, yet so subtle and badass. The other aspect is generic 80s hair metal with usually goes with the battles, and works perfectly. Transformers and Hair Metal were born to be together. There is one scene that bizarrely used Weird Al Yankovich's Dare To Be Stupid. It makes no sense with what's going on to have a parody song with such dumb lyrics, but it's surprisingly effective. Does this music make Transformers seem totally dated? Of course, but that's not a bad thing.

Transformers isn't meant to be watched as a serious film, at least for most, but more just a little bit of nostalgia. You pop this thing in and you feel like a kid again watching it for the first time in the 80s with your action figures all lined up, sitting in your Transformers pyjamas, on your bed with Transformers bed sheets. Almost any young boy growing up in the 80s loved Transformers, and even a few like myself who later had the priviledge of watching reruns or the newer series, but damn, it's fun to feel like a kid again.

That's not to stay Transformers doesn't still hold up. It's still a terrificly well made movie, but it also has one major legacy, probably one of the biggest in the history of animated films. As I can recall, this was the first animated movie to use celebrity voices, something is so commonplace now that not doing it would be considred bizarre. Featured in this movie are the usual Transformers voice actors like Peter Cullen, Frank Welker & Chris Matta, but along with that we have Judd Nelson as Hot Rod, Robert Stack, Scatman Crothers, Casey Kasem, Eric Idle, Leonard Nimoy, and most famously Orsen Welles. Now again, calling these people famous makes the movie seem dated but it still just adds to the charm. The voice acting is completely awesome all the way through. Peter Cullen still sounds as wise as ever, Chris Matta still sounds insane, and all the celebrities are great, especially Orsen Welles. This was Welles' last performance in any movie. At the time he ws just a dying old man who didn't care at all about Transformers, didn't know his characters name, and thought the movie was nothing more than a big toy commercial. It's kind of ironic, because it's one of the movie sinister villain voices in any movie I've ever seen, and it never fails to haunt me. I say screw Citizen Kane, you wanna see a damn good Orsen Welles, check out Transformers because any actor who can not give a shit and still steal the show has earned my respect.

My absolute favourite thing about this movie though is how dark it is. It's not all like the show in the sense of how violent it is. All of the sudden they just kill eachother in all these brutal ways with no remorce, for a kid it was crazy but in retrospect I think it was a brilliant movie and makes it hold up better than say G.I. Joe which was nothing more than just public service announcements for kids with some action and more of Chris Matta's crazy voice. Just the idea of killing off Optamus & Megatron in the first 10 minutes, the series main hero and main villain showed that this movie had balls, and that's why it's so great.

In conclusion, Transformers the movie is great if you like Transformers. Film purists might critique it's boring characters, lack of emotion (I've heard that many times and still can't believe they can say Optamus' death had a lack of emotion), or a thin plot that focused more on action. But if you're like me and love Transformers, or are looking for some memories, then boom, just kick this baby in, here that theme music come on, and there you are, it's classic.