Review of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning (2006) by Michael L — 29 Oct 2015

A piece of crap from start to finish and something you just want to forget about right after you watch it. This film is just a pointless excuse to show some gore and it is not interesting or scary in any sense of the word.

A backstory on Leatherface does sound like it has some potential, but the way the filmmakers approach this material is just basic and by-the-numbers in every shot and there was no thought put into this movie whatsoever.

The only thing that I could complement is how hilariously bad it was and how I was laughing my ass off at some of the lines of dialogue and scenes that were supposed to be intense but were just laughable instead.

Besides unintentional hilarity, this film has nothing to offer at all. There is no good story, the characters are one-dimensional and bland throughout, there is no suspense and tension to be found anywhere, the dialogue is piss poor, the acting is phoned in, and the directing is horrible.

Jonathan Liebesman shouldn't be a filmmaker in Hollywood because he is not good at it. The way he direct scenes is below average and the camera shakes way too much during the scenes of action that you can't get a clear image of what you are witnessing on screen.

The whole cast in this so-called movie really does horrible. The only one that stands out by an inch is R. Lee Ermey. He made for a more convincing villain than Leatherface himself. Leatherface was basically just his puppet throughout the whole movie doing whatever his master told him to do.

Thank god for the Fast and Furious franchise because without it, Jordana Brewster wouldn't have a career in Hollywood. She really didn't do much of a credible job here. All she really did was just run around, scream for help and witness her failed attempts at saving her friends.

Speaking of her friends, they were even more terrible. Matt Bomer and Taylor Handley were both terrible too and you didn't give one flying crap if they survived or not. Diora Baird is basically just a damsel in distress throughout the whole movie.

She just lays on the ground and screams her ass off and her character was completely helpless and she didn't think or do anything to get out alive. In the end, I don't feel like talking about the movie anymore because it's not worth it and there are hundreds of other movies I would rather talk about more than this one.