Review of The Revenant (2015) by Hdbfly — 15 Jan 2016

The most overrated film of the year. Slow, overlong, lifeless--except when Tom Hardy is on the screen, and then it's electric. About halfway through, I wondered why I was supposed to care about this guy, beside the lightly-handled (and beautifully shot) annihilation of the native village he lived (?) in with his very pretty (in white man's terms) wife at some point, and his, frankly, weird relationship with his son--I felt no love between them at all, didn't believe they were even related. I guess because his family was murdered we're supposed to immediately feel for him. Except that familial relationship was never established, simply hinted at in dreams and visions, and when he barked at his son to shut up.

I actually felt for Fitzgerald, Tom Hardy's character, because we knew something about him, we knew what he wanted, we knew what his job was, what his contract was for, we know he was getting screwed no matter what. And Tom Hardy imbued his character with amazing depth in just how his expression changed when people would talk to him; he was a desperate man in desparate times. Which I suppose the Glass character was too, but his journey just started becoming totally improbable--I thought of the old silent film serial, remade in the 30s, called The Perils of Pauline, and thought this could be called The Perils of Paul . . . and yes, I know that's not his name. It became a series of coincidences that started to feel writerly and not organic. He flew off a cliff after everything else and was like, let me gut this horse!

And how did the French guys not see the sweat lodge as they were killing Glass's Pawnee bison tartare eating friend? And why didn't anybody wear hats? And how could he not have been hypothermic after being in that cold cold river for so long? And how come he couldn't place the bear right away? He could smell smoke in the air for a fire that had been put out hours ago but he couldn't hear that there was a bear behind him, as he looked all over the place?

A half an hour could have easily been cut. Easily, but none of Tom Hardy. Overrated pseudo-art.