Review of The Midnight Meat Train (2008) by Guido M — 19 Jun 2012

I don't have any problem with horror movies that are gory, slashy and with nothing more than death to get people into the theatre. But The Midnight Meat Train is not scary, and that's what horror should be about.

Beggining for the point of view of blood, this movie has lots of it, even the softer scenes are full of corpses, heads and human limbs flying around.

There is a point where I want to take that blood out, because more than horror is causing me a barely humouristic sense. But of course, not too much.

So that's the main problem with the movie. I don't know which genre it belongs. It's not Horror (Absolutely unscary, no jumps, just blood), It's Not a Thriller (No surprises or shocking scenes) and, well, It's not a drama neither a comedy.

So What the Midnight Meat Train has to get at least one star?

Well, it offers a wonderful direction, somehow creepy what Ryuhei Kitamura, and some feeling this movie lacks of by Bradley Cooper, The rest, blood and guts.

What Clive Barker wrote on Book of Blood is nothing compared to this. Even though it's difficult to say if it was more bloody or not, it sure was more entertaining. This movie is boring, boring as hell. Slow, even the killer cannot entertain with it's terribly violent kills.

So, The Midnight Meat Train was a lame, boring, unscary and slow bad adaptated horror flick to Clive Barker's thrilling horror story, that this movie cannot equal.