Review of The Legend of Tarzan (2016) by Cork B — 15 Oct 2018

I only caught the last 45 minutes, but I HAVE to leave you a warning review. Stay away. Far away. Horrible cliches abound. And I still have a bad taste in my mouth from watching another Skarsgard dumpster fire "Hold the Dark". So very very many horrible logic mistakes in the "climactic battle" (anything but). I guess the bad... Belgians? fight by standing around with their loaded weapons, don't fire a shot, and then try to slow the rampaging animals by falling under them. Just awful. And Waltz should not be the referred to as the bad guy, he should be the dumb guy. Talking the hero to death never works.

To be fair, I will give it one star, because something not awful MIGHT have happened in the first or second acts, although I doubt it. And Jane's hair had just the right amount of product to offset the fake face scratches. Sheesh.