Review of The Gay Bed and Breakfast of Terror (2007) by Joanna L — 04 Jul 2012

The Gay Bed and Breakfast of Terror (Jaymes Thompson, 2007).

I've actually had a number of people, in the months since I watched this, ask me what in the world I was thinking. I don't get it, because to me, the answer is obvious. It's called The Gay Bed and Breakfast of Terror. I mean, come on, how can you NOT want to watch a movie called The Gay Bed and Breakfast of Terror? This is a movie title that promises laughs, or at least uncomfortable giggles. Acres of stupid satire rivalling only the acres of fabulous fashion. Oh, and there will probably be a serial killer running around. Score! Sadly, the reality was far from the promise, but it wasn't entirely unwatchable.

Plot: Helen (Mari Marks) and her daughter Luella (Georgia Jean) run a small bed and breakfast in the middle of nowhere that experiences a sudden surge in popularity when all the hotels in the city fill up for a weekend get-together (it's never explicitly stated, but the chance everyone in this movie is not referring to LA PRIDE is essentially nil) before everyone who's planning on attending gets a room. And thus, five couples (and one fag-hag sister) check into Helen and Luella's Sahara Salvation Inn, home of the country's best mincemeat muffins. And, oh, yeah, a homophobic serial killer (bet you didn't read about that in the brochure...).

To be fair, The Gay Bed and Breakfast of Terror does deliver some hefty doses of satire, and Jaymes Thompson's script is loads better than his direction (he left the director's chair to producer Sean Abley when Abley took much of this cast to helm Socket later that year). And the movie does offer a few broad laughs based on that satire, though most of them are uncomfortably close to prejudice (ooh, let's make fun of the lipstick lesbians!). Still, it does manage to hit the mark a time or two (its slaps at the âplottingâ? in modern porn films are hysterical, and there's a promising subplot with two characters who discover they may actually be hetero... though it gets dropped when things start getting complex). Or it would if anyone involved in this movie were actually an actor. There are a few folks who have some nascent chops that could be made into something good (Georgia Jean seems especially promising), but much of this cast were obviously in it for the love of the thing. It is unfortunate indeed that enthusiasm will only take you so far. **.