Review of The Cave (2005) by Lakeesha B — 25 Sep 2010

Justly savaged upon its release, largely forgotten today, "The Cave" is every bit the stupid nothing of a film you can tell it is with a glance at the half-baked DVD cover.

Apart from a game cast -- all of whom deserved a much, much better film than this stupid little trifle -- every aspect of "Cave" is botched in one way or another. To compound matters, the mangled pacing and blase storytelling is capped off with an idiotic "OMG!"-twist-ending designed to catch the audience off-guard but really is only frustrating and proves that director Bruce Hunt and writers Michael Steinberg and Tegan West hadn't the slightest clue what the fuck they were doing through the entire film.

Piper Perabo gets one badass action-heroine moment about halfway through the film which is, for a moment, interesting before it gets offset by yet another moronic development in the antagonistic cave-dwelling creatures' anatomy. Then she dies. How irritating.