Review of The Big Sick (2017) by Spangle — 07 Jul 2017

In writing, it is said that it is best to write what you know. That way, you can bring that authentic and real emotion, feeling, and touch to the events depicted. Perhaps no recent film has better embodied this than The Big Sick. Though directed by Michael Showalter, this is really Kumail Nanjiani and Emily Gordon's show. The married pair of screenwriters who sat down and put the story of their meeting, Emily's illness, the issues regarding a Pakistani immigrant and American girl dating, and their eventual reunion. Wherever they may take liberties with their own story to make it more cinematic - if these moments exist - does nothing to stamp out the way in which the film deftly handles a variety of issues. Whatever bridge is tries to cross, it does so running. Finding the comedy in joy, sadness, pain, rejection, and anxiety, The Big Sick is often a profound and moving experience, but is always a thoroughly enjoyable one. How it manages to become this is because of one simple fact: Nanjiani and Gordon were there, so they know how it all felt.

Kumail Nanjiani is this romantic comedy with Zoe Kazan starring as Kumail's real wife, Emily. A Pakistani immigrant, Kumail is a stand-up comedian who must cope with his family's strict religious beliefs and fervent desire for him to meet a Pakistani girl. Along the way, he meets cute with Emily and the two quickly hit it off. In portraying the issues Kumail has with his family and how it impacts his relationship, The Big Sick benefits greatly from being written by those who experienced the feeling. As a result of Kumail's family, their relationship is highly complex. If they stay together, then Kumail is exiled from his family and Emily feels remorse for being the cause behind him losing his family. However, if they keep their relationship hidden as Kumail intends, then Emily is hurt as it makes it feel as though he does not want her in the way that she wants him. It is a slippery slope and one that must be confronted. Having everyone walk away happy is likely improbable due to the steep barrier of culture keeping them apart. Worsening the situation is all of the little intricacies of which they remain blissfully unaware, highlighted by Kumail having to constantly explain arranged marriage to Emily and those around them. This gulf in culture, no matter how Americanized Kumail has become, will always be there and must be approached cautiously by both sides.

Where the film really soars, however, is when Emily is not even there. Zoe Kazan is fantastic, but the film becomes quite profound when Kumail is thrust into a situation where he must cope with Emily's illness and meeting her parents. Terry (Ray Romano) and Beth (Holly Hunter) rush from North Carolina to care for their daughter as she fights off a mystery illness and also meet Kumail for the first time. Reeling from the two breaking up due to Kumail's unwillingness to lose his family and Emily's unwillingness to make him lose his family, it is a rather awkward situation for him with Beth knowing all of the sordid details, including Kumail's lying and dishonesty regarding his family. Thus, tensions run quite high initially before they come to bond over one thing: Emily. Their love, care, fear, and pain, that is shared with each ebb and flow of her illness and the frustration felt when the doctors are clueless, brings them together. They reach deep within themselves to overcome this and the writing by Nanjiani and Gordon is raw, emotional, and powerful. This area is perhaps mostly driven by Nanjiani considering Gordon was not there, but the film nonetheless captures the emotions of everybody involved brilliantly. Watching a loved one fight an illness is a truly helpless feeling, worsened when doctors are unsure why it is happening (which is always). The Big Sick never feels exploitative, is smartly written in this arena, and captures both the light moments that bring a smile to your face - Beth showing old high school photos of Emily in her "goth phase" to Kumail - and the shared sadness when the news is particularly hard. All of this culminates into the greatest release: Emily overcoming his illness.

Though a true story and obviously going to end up with Kumail and Emily being together, the film smartly never falls into the trap of rushing them back together when she overcomes her illness. As she fights, the film lays the groundwork for this in its inclusion of Terry's infidelity. It is clear before this reveal that Terry and Beth are constantly at one another's throats. In hearing it from Terry, he was forgiven by her but she never let go of it and never was able to overcome her hurt from his transgression. For his part, he still hates himself for what he did to her. It is a slow process of healing for their relationship with both sleeping in separate beds. Taking years of healing, The Big Sick sums it up quite neatly with Beth coming back into Terry's bed, but it highlights the slow build-up.