Review of Tekken (2010) by Dan M — 20 Aug 2010

There are a number of irrefutible FACTS in life; the sun will rise and fall each day, politicians will lie & philander, when you're looking for a lost item somebody will inevitably say 'Where was it last?'...and video games adapted into movies are ALWAYS a complete and total mess, this being no stranger to the rule.

Characters barely resemble their Namco namesakes with some even having a completely different style of fighting than the games...and when they do fight the styles of martial artistry are nothing like those of the game characters. This whole affair is total pond scum shite of the highest order with the as mentioned fights a true let down. Made for kids Tekken looks good and manages to make the fighters sometimes 'look' the part but this all falls on its face, Jin Kazama gets beaten up a lot and then just when you think he's a dead man he has yet another 'dead mommy flashback' and wrangles a pikey ass victory...yeh...great.

If the Yanks hadn't taken this from the Japs and added their signature chop-chop 80,000 cuts per punch move, this may have turned out to be reasonable. But alas the Japs didn't get to make it and the whole thing is utter piss.