Review of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014) by Diego Andrés Q — 13 Jan 2015

So, finally I got a chance to see the infamous new teenage mutant ninja turtles film.. it isn't bad and it isn't good, in fact, it isn't much of anything to tell you the truth. The turtles almost seemed like secondary character's in the movie.

Surprisingly enough, the one casting choice of Megan Fox as April O'Neil is the thing I thought that worked very well. Go figure. As far as the turtles and Master Splinter themselves... I mean there all here, but none of them are really fleshed out or given any real personality.

I mean, Ralph's still the angry one, Don the nerdy one, Mikey is the "cool" one and Leonardo is the serious one. Don't even get me started on Shredder. I don't even know what he's suppose to be exactly.

He looked like a Ultra Mecha Shredder or God damn Transformer. I dunno. Over all the movie just feels... Generic. With an absurd concept like talking turtles who do karate the sky is the limit, but imagination is on low supply here.

Instead we get an OKAY movie that could have been filled basically with any other 4 heroes driven by a cliched evil plot that could have been filled by any other enemies. Like I said it isn't bad, but it just seems like a wasted opportunity.

Lots of people out there seem to think that Michael bay directed this, however he didnt and after watching it, you'll wish he did. At least his version would have been ridiculous. We could all bask in the overstuffness that is Michael bay, but instead we only get two pieces of bread and bologna with some government cheese.

While the original 90's movie isn't exactly great art I thought at least that film captured the spirit of the Saturday morning cartoon (the sequels not sooo much). Meh. ill say one thing though, advances in CGI technology and film wizardry are able to create a Megan Fox so lifelike you'd swear she was actually human.