Review of Surf Ninjas (1993) by Andreas O — 21 Oct 2010

How did my parents survive taking me to this??? This movie was satisfying to my six-year-old self. But as a grown man I find all the characters' logic as twisted as some of the freeways in downtown Los Angeles.

The logic of the characters is the most insulting part of the movie, becuase the writers and director expect you to follow it without a problem. Including a huge continuity error where the brothers and their best friend are on a ship departing from the west coast to an island in the South China Sea.

The scene is basically something out of a traveling scene in an "Indiana Jones" movie. To make a long story short, how can a boat that departs from Los Angeles go through the Panama Canal when it's not even in the direction of their destination? I can't say that the characters in this movie deserved the title of "ninjas" because I saw little or no martial arts from any party.

The fight scenes are poorly filmed, suffering from too many quick cuts which leaves the viewer doing mathematical equations in their heads, and it's either the director of photography or the fight choreographer who thinks that by simply filming a fight scene with a shot of one's back whilst they fight their opponent in front of them (who is not visible to the viewer) constitutes a somewhat decent fight scene.

But the biggest problem with the choreography in this film is that the producers and director think that by simply having a bunch of gymnasts do a lot of back flips and somersaults over furniture or through windows to just garner a dramatic entrance, equates to martial arts.

Ernie Reyes Jr's. fight scene in "The Rundown" was a lot more impressive than what I saw from him here. His only glorious moment is in a scene where he does a somersault over and armed gaurd with no quick cuts whatsoever, giving him a chance to show his potential to do even more elaborate moves, the only problem is that it was a 4-second shot.

If you are looking for a lot of corny comedy, then this is your film, the cast will definately satiate all your corny needs whilst adding their twisted logic to the formula, if I may reiterate. And finally, instead of socializing themselves with the people of the island they rescue, it seems that to the writer the only way for the brothers to celebrate a victory in a foreign country, is to fixate the American culture in which they were raised in on the indigenous.

Mystery Science Theater would have a field day with this movie!