Review of Star Wars: The Last Jedi (2017) by Volteer — 10 Jan 2018

Positive:

-The visuals are great and epic all the way through (hence why I'm not giving 0 points).

Negative:

-Mary Sue main character who can beat anyone in fights with 0 training while the actress says it can't be Mary Sue because that's sexist.

-Unnecessary forced jokes throughout all the movie (In a scene that's supposed to be an epic battle the bad guys are LITERALLY defeated because of a prank call that ends with a "your mother" joke).

-The "First Order" is so incompetent it's absolutely laughable. They have all the top military technology and giant ships and loads and loads of soldiers (which is never explained how they got all that stuff in the first place), yet they **** up the most basic logistical tasks and keep getting beaten by 20 people in outdated junk tech.

-Leia get's blown up into space in an actually epic scene that would have been a great opportunity to kill off her character since the actress died. But nope, she suddenly has op force powers that help her survive in space and she just floats to the starship door like Marry Poppins.

-Admiral Ackbar is killed offscreen to make room for a forced feminist violet-haired character to be in charge (which might be why they had to come up with something to knock out Leia in the first place) who just plays games with Poe to show how she's a strong independent woman even if that ends up killing half the Resistance because she was too proud to tell her plan to anyone.

-Forced Casino side-plot with yet another forced feminist character where they search for a "master hacker" while criticizing capitalism and animal abuse just to find some random drunk in a cell who just happens to also be a master hacker after being told the other master hacker is the only one who can do it. Then they get betrayed by the drunk master hacker so the whole side plot ends up being useless anyway.

-The rest of the resistance uses junk-gliders to take on like 20 top tier AT-ATs because they need to destroy a giant laser-cannon but most of them get blown up on the way. Finn tries to sacrifice himself which would actually have been a great moment and would have made it feel like there's actual consequence in the movie, but in one of the most stupid moments in movie history the random girl crashes into Finn and basically (almost) sacrifices herself for saving Finn from saving the resistance and then proceeds to kiss him after knowing him for like 8 hours.

-Finn is just able to drag the random girl for miles and miles to the base without any protection without being shot.

-Luke appears and gives the movie an epic final showdown with Kylo Ren, which would have made a somewhat worthy death for him, sacrificing himself, but then reveals he just trolled everyone with a hologram. But then he just dies anyway from a heart attack or whatever so what was the point of not personally showing up...

-Once again incompetent First Order can't notice the Millenium Falcon escaping.

I definitely won't pay any money for the 9th movie and deeply regret paying money for this garbage.