Review of Secretariat (2010) by Erno K — 07 Nov 2011

Man, I am such a sucker for these type of movies. I can't stand horses in real life, so why the hell do I always like movies that star said beasts of burden? This is one of life's big mysteries I guess.

Yes it's sentimental Disney fare. Yes it's formulaic. But goddamn, sometimes you just have to watch a movie that is inspiring and makes you mentally pump your fist in the air in triumph. And the crazy part is it's all true. I googled that shit. It's really crazy to watch the original footage of the Belmont Stakes race. It's like Secretariat had a turbo booster that he decided to turn on at the halfway mark. By the way, the arch nemesis horsey of Seabiscuit, Man o' War, was also the predecessor of Secretariat, which is kind of cool.

Horse breeding has always fascinated me for some reason. All the secrecy, money, valued grandsires and hundreds of years of history that go along with the best race horses intrigue me. It's like an awesome mini game inside the racing scene.

No wonder I liked this movie, though, because it is directed by Randall Wallace. He is the man who wrote Braveheart, one of my absolute favorite movies of all time. The bastard knows how to tug my heartstrings. Great performances from Lane and Malkovich.

I think Secretariat would have owned Seabiscuit. Aw, he went there! Seabiscuit rules in the name department though. You can't get much lamer than Secretariat. But he had three white socks, which is badass. I still would have named him Thunderhoof or something.