Review of R.I.P.D. (2013) by Thegodfatherson — 18 Jul 2013

RED and Flightplan director Robert Schwentke's paranormal action flick R.I.P.D. is based on a comic book of the same name by Peter M. Lenkov. For everyone else involved, it's a Men in Black sequel that swaps ghosts in for aliens. That's OK the MIB franchise rests on chemistry and that's what makes R.I.P.D. halfway tolerable. Ryan Reynolds, the perfect leading man who can't catch a break in Hollywood, stars as Nick, a Boston cop trying to carve out a life with his French lovely, Julia (Stephanie Szostak). Nick has made on major mistake in that genial plan: At his most recent drug bust, he helped his parter Hayes (Kevin Bacon) steal some ancient gold he thinks can be pawned for serious dollars. Why was there ancient gold stashed away in the crates that carried illegal drugs into Boston? This is one of the many blanks R.I.P.D. asks you to fill in. "You have seen enough movies, it should be easy," the script silently says to us as it speeds along to make its 90-minute runtime. When Nick decides he's out of the corrupt gold smuggling plot, Hayes shoots him in the face. That would be the end of most Boston cops, but it turns out.

The Massachusetts city is one of the most haunted places in America, and requires the policing of a Heavenly force known as R.I.P.D.. Nick is recruited to the afterlife squad, paired up with Roy (Jeff Bridges), a rootin' tootin' riff on True Grit's Rooster Cogburn. After 15 minutes of deciphering Bridges' mush-mouthed, cowboy drawl, R.I.P.D. kicks into high gear and delivers genuine laughs. Why Reynolds, the fastest wit in the West, was sentenced to playing the straight man, we may never know. But he still meshes with the kook antics of Roy, who drives his big yellow car like he's kicked back in a rocking chair and spools out ghastly death sentences like their parking tickets. Nick learning the ropes of Dead-O wrangling is half the movie, as the nonsensical logic of the world is explained in a series of ghost-busting sequences. As our brains attempt to figure out geography and slip into the groove of an action sequence, Schwentke uses special effects to lunge forward, never finding a frame or reasoning for doing so. It's burst of unmotivated energy and it only serves to jostle our cortexes. Do not see this movie in 3D, a last-minute addition that mauls the decent character work between Reynold and Bridges to death. R.I.P.D. is one of the few movies that could use a bit more breathing room in its runtime to flesh out the dynamic and gradually tell a story, versus the tactic it takes. Halfway through the movie, a mission pops up through a magical exposition tube that gives purposes to everything we have been watching and carries (limps?) R.I.P.D. across the finish line. You don't know Men in Black is a skillfully crafted action comedy until you have seen R.I.P.D. and that might be the best reason to see it. Despite Schwentke's complete inability to work around lower production value why can District 9 look so good and R.I.P.D. look so awful? Reynolds and Bridges deserve around of applause. They bring soul to a lifeless blockbuster corpse.