Review of Red Heat (1988) by Edward B — 18 Aug 2011

Well, it was a dud back in 1988, and lo and behold, it's still a dud. The worst part of this movie isn't that it does anything so abhorrently wrong. It's that it doesn't excel at doing anything above average. The action scenes are watchable but not exciting. The villains are bad, but uninteresting. Same thing with the cops.

To me, the most interesting element is the character played by Gina Gershon. She happens to be the wife of notorious murderer Victor Rostavilli, and she's a real bargaining chip for the police, but her role is completely downplayed. Victor's deals, double crosses, plans to complete his goals all take place offscreen, so there's nothing to establish him as any real threat, especially because he's going up against the mother of all kick ass heroes: Arnold Schwarzennegger.

I was sold on this movie because I heard Arnold was playing a Russian cop. Arnold speaking with a Russian accent? This I gotta see! Unfortunately, while Arnold isn't a total train wreck in his performance, he's not that exciting to watch either here. He drifts in and out of his Russian accent, and is oddly unconvincing when he speaks the language too. He has very few one liners, so anyone watching this movie for a good laugh will be disappointed. Also contributing to the dullness of this dullfest is James Belushi, who doesn't say a single funny line in the entire 105 minutes, although he has many attempts.

All in all, this is a weak film. Not a horrible one. But a very mediocre one. So mediocre, you will forget about it almost as quickly as you watch it.