Review of Pitch Perfect (2012) by Justin F — 14 May 2015

I think that I am normally a very mild mannered man but this film made me angry to the point where I had serious thoughts of self harm. Had I seen this in the theatre then those around me would have been in danger too. Thank the maker that I watched this in isolation (not whilst donning a special jacket I might add).

Super moody (therefore super cool) wannabe DJ Beca is hassled by her wealthy parents to attend a college of their choosing. Problem is that spoilt little rich girl Beca (also hating the name big time) would sooner be throwing the needle to the groove down at the local happening club. You know the sort, where if your names not down you are not coming in, by invitation only? Truth is that id prefer it if my name wasnt on the list and instead spent the entire evening with a pint of mild in a pub with just me and an old man and his Jack Russell for company. Im going off topic now but I am steadily losing the will to live again.

Back on track, when her parents find out she is not attending classes they attempt to bribe her by offering her a deal. Join a club at college, and if after a year she still isnt interested then he will pay for her to move to LA. Not sure why you would want to go there, I mean they dont even have an NFL team to call their own!!

Anyway, Beca eventually decides to join an all-girl acappella group called Barden Bellas which has amongst its members a token "big old unit" to keep in line with stereotypes and traditions. This character calls herself Fat Amy and is openly upfront about her rotundness and we all laugh, except I didnt? Dont get me wrong, when done right this kind of character can work well without being an insult (eg. Bridesmaids)? In my (dubious) opinion its not even in the same league as that and I feel that I have insulted Bridesmaids just by mentioning it in the same sentence as Pitch Perfect.

Back on track (again) the synopsis on RT refers to the music as "toe-tapping"? Except that I found it about as toe tapping as underwater Bulgarian folk music. There is also a scene in a empty swimming pool where the students have a rap style battle "riff-off" that in my opinion goes down as one of the most painful, hurtful and disturbing scenes in cinema history. I spent the duration of this scene biting my knuckles in a kind of Borat, UK Office type embarrassment (except not as good). **SPOILER ALERT** Sadly, in the end everyone lives.

Thing is that I really liked Anna Kendrick in Up In The Air but I will forgive her this misdemeanor (just this once) but please be a little more selective with the roles you take?

This film was recommended to me by a friend who (as a punishment for this heinous act) I have threatened to never speak to her again!! Finally, if I ever hear that cover of The Sign (by Ace of Base) again im going to go postal in Surbiton town center. You have all been warned and I absolve myself of any responsibility.