Review of No Escape (2015) by Manny C — 05 Sep 2015

If you're a white dude from Texas you better watch the fuck out. Thats the problem facing Owen Wilson, who's just taken a job in a conveniently unnamed country in Southeast Asia (the film was shot in Thailand, they should declare war). The locals are all pissed off at United States imperialism that's making a grab for their water supply and now a coup has taken place and they're on a rampage. Bodies are everywhere. If you're Wilson' thick-headed Jack, your middle-management skills of course now become 007-level survival instincts to fight off the avatars of 'yellow peril' that are coming for your wife (Lake Bell, sue your agent) and daughters. Luckily, a former 007 shows up in the form of Pierce Brosnan's Hammond, a gruff Brit with ties to....oh you already know, that's how pathetically predictable this movie is. As for the nonwhite folks native to the unnamed country? Who cares, because the movie sure doesn't give a damn about them.

That's the ludicrous premise for the racist and tepid No Escape, a shameless mix of suspense and stereotypes that is Michael Bay-level crass. Director John Erick Dowdle (Quarantine, As Above So Below), who wrote the script with his bro Drew Dowdle, has some technical proficiency when it comes to handheld camerawork and quick editing. Say this for the movie, it really moves. But a whole army can't help the Brothers Dowdle get past the plot holes in this swill. Wilson and Bell always look out of breath, probably because they're running and only running rather than acting. Quality escapism is a rare thing in the dog days of summer, but no one should be so desperate that they'd actually pay to see No Escape. You can do better.