Review of Next (2007) by Chads. — 28 Apr 2007

If you're not in the mood to see a pair of slumming actors cashing a paycheck, don't see "Next"; see their next movie, because Julianne Moore(as a FBI agent) cheats her adoring public this time out by being stingy with the facial expressions(she uses one, a steely determination expressed through squinted eyes), and Nicolas Cage(who introduces the notion of an anti-action star) as a magician/psychic, is too in love with Liz(Jessica Biel), and too busy doing his multiplicty trick, to offer any personality quirks as a diversion from the routine gunplay and explosions.

"Next" aspires to be, I don't know, "The Sum Of All Fears" meets "What The @#$* Do We Know?" If you're a big fan of "Groundhog Day", your blood will boil at how this film rips off Bill Murray's sweet and hillarious attempts to win Andie McDowell's heart.

In "Next", Cris' first(and second, third, fourth...) contact to seduce Liz has all the charm... of an action movie. His acquisition of Liz's adoration is so dishonest, it has the effect of ruining that classic sequence from the Harold Ramis classic, because it reveals such a tactic of persistence as being somewhat sleazy.

"Next" is "a movie for men who love movies"(from an old TBS tagline to promote the cable network's array of bad action flicks), and quantum physics.