Review of Masters of the Universe (1987) by Rosco B — 08 Apr 2013

"I have the power!".

Hmm.

The Filmation cartoon was insultingly condescending to kids as well as even more insultingly badly animated, yet it still prods the nostalgia glands of those of a certain age. The same cannot be surely said for this debacle, which came out as Cannon Films were already something of a spent force.

Dolph Lundgren cuts a dash in his blonde mullet, cape and bondage gear but the film struggles from the start - particularly in the grating scenes involving the all-American teens (including a young Courteney Cox, fresh from 'Dancing in The Dark' with The Boss) that the young target-audience is supposedly meant to 'relate to.'.

Langella gives it a go as the chief villain: but he just doesn't have his TV counterpart Alan Oppenheimer's voice. Or laugh.

Moreover, the budget constraints are evident in the ineffective urban setting, and in the absence of some of the more popular (and awkward to visualise cinematically) characters from the show such as Battle Cat, Orko, Mer-Man et al. The movie's spell is also a little lost on the viewer with jerky special effects and a somewhat rushed ending that schlock uber-producers Golan and Glebus (whose names sound like they could be in Skeletor's posse themselves) must've known would struggle to convince on-screen.

Thankfully, the sequel hinted at by the post credit sequence in which Langella's Skeletor pokes his napper out of the ether and hisses "I'll be back!" never materialised.