Review of Male and Female (1919) by Edith N — 13 Aug 2011

Maybe If the Leopard Had Killed Gloria Swanson?

I strongly suspect the producers of [i]Red Dwarf[/i] of being familiar with the original play, if not necessarily this version thereof. After all, their "only competent person in a small group trapped far from anyone else" is named Kryten. I suspect that growing up in the UK probably kept them better acquainted with the not-[i]Peter Pan[/i] works of J. M. Barrie than the average American is. Not only that, but they're substantially older than I and therefore had a quite different education. It is certainly true that the crew, what there is of it for most of the series, of the [i]Red Dwarf[/i] would have died had the ship not provided for their needs, and most of the characters in this would have died on their deserted island had not they had a single competent figure. One rather begins to wonder how they all survived in London, come to that.

William Crichton (Thomas Meighan) is the butler to Lord Loam (Theodore Roberts) and his family. Most notably his daughter, Lady Mary Lasenby (Gloria Swanson). Lady Mary is supposed to marry someone much more suitable, but first, the family goes off on a cruise through the South Seas. Tweeny (Lila Lee), the scullery maid, somehow gets to go along as a ladies' maid, because she wants to be close to Crichton. But Crichton only has eyes for Lady Mary. While someone, I missed who, is consoling Tweeny, he manages to steer the boat into a cliff, because they're about twelve feet off the shore of an island and not paying attention to it. Anyway, Crichton, as the one who can keep them alive, gets seriously declared king of the island, and he gets whatever he wants--until they see a ship.

There's also the little matter of Lady Mary's friend, Lady Eileen Duncraigie (Rhy Darby), who fell in love with her chauffeur (Henry Woodward) and married him. She is, naturally, completely ruined. Her father casts her out--and, not incidentally, fires her husband--and her husband's friends want nothing to do with her. Lady Mary had initially advised her friend against the marriage, and it is only after the return from the island that she insists that love should be enough for anyone. Which actually then ends in loveless marriages all 'round, I think--or at least loveless on one side. Crichton and Lady Mary would probably end up being completely miserable, though for reasons that have little to do with class, but I don't think his marrying someone he doesn't care two pins about is better.

I'm not familiar with the poet Lady Mary and Crichton keep quoting, but I have some serious problems with it. Namely the idea that you can have a king in Babylon and a Christian slave at the same time. By the time there were Christians to be slaves, there were no kings left in Babylon. Oh, it gives rise to one of those glorious Cecil B. DeMille set pieces--one of the first, in fact. And, in true DeMille style, that was Gloria Swanson with actual lions. The original play is called [i]The Admirable Crichton[/i], and it's certainly true that there is much to be admired about him. It's just that his taste in literature is, to my mind, lacking. Though it is rather typical of the popular poetry of the era.

Honestly, I don't believe they were on an island at all. I think they were on a peninsula and could have gotten to civilization at any time. The simple fact is, that "island" has too large a population of jaguars. And that's leaving aside that the only other large animals we ever see are the humans. However, I think the other people were too incompetent to ever consider such a thing, and I think Crichton rather liked having them under his power at last. I mean, he ate his meals in solitary splendor, being waited on by the women. There was no sharing, despite the fact that communal living is smarter under the circumstances they were in. On the other hand, these were members of the British aristocracy, and being subservient to their own butler was probably more comforting to them than being equal to him.