Review of Kull the Conqueror (1997) by Paul S — 14 Aug 2008

This movie is, without a fraction of any doubt, the greatest feat of creativity, art, philosophy, and story-telling in the history of human civilization. It is rumored that as soon as this movie was released in theaters, a star emerged from above, and shined its radiant beam down onto the chosen one who would lead us into a new period of history, an awakening of the senses that strived for all that is good and just in the world. This chosen one was Kevin Sorbo, better known as Kull: The Conqueror. Oh simple viewer, be not fooled by the title of this movie. Kull is not only the Conqueror of the barbarian kingdom portrayed in the movie. Indeed, he is the conqueror of our hearts, and our minds. He is the eternal beacon that inspires us to make the best of our meager lives and to laugh in the face of those who oppose us. Do not just see this movie. Experience it. Live it. Rejoice.

Plus, Kull totally smashes things with an axe.