Review of Hostel (2011) by Wesley W — 14 Apr 2015

This has a fresh rating? Are you kidding me? This? For real? This was just a painful film to sit through, not because of the film's bloody violence, but because of the terrible acting, excruciating dialogue, nonexistent story, and dull villains.

This movie is just seeing a bunch of uninteresting dirt bags from America taking a trip to Amsterdam to get laid, drink, and sight see. None of it was interesting at all and the characters were as one-dimensional as a piece of grass.

There were so many stupid scenes and the group of people here act like dumb idiots, they were not likable at all, and when they finally got captured and tortured, I couldn't be more happy to see that unfold.

Eli Roth directs the movie with no skill at all and you can clearly tell the movie is just torture porn more than anything else. In my opinion, the Saw franchise was actually enjoyable because those films had more of a logical point, they had a credible villain, and they had substance to go along with all the gruesome violence.

Here there is basically no substance whatsoever and nothing to get you to care about anything happening on screen. There was also dumb scenes in which a large group of kids would show up to try to take things from people and those scenes were completely pointless and I couldn't figure out for the life of me why they were there in the first place.

The DVD copy I watched this movie on was complete crap. I always watch movies with subtitles and here the subtitles seemed like they were typed by 8 year olds. Sentence structuring was way off. There never be any spaces between sentences, commas were in wrong places, and words would be misspelled many times.

The picture quality was also complete crap and some scenes ended up being too dark that I could not see what was on screen. Finally to add on to the terrible DVD transfer, the words " property from Lions Gate" would appear 3 times in the movie's 94 minute run time.

Needless to say, it was the worst DVD transfer I have ever seen in my entire life. The only thing that keeps me from giving this 0.5 out of 5 stars is the gory violence and torture scenes. These were needed in my opinion, because these characters were stupid, unlikable, unsympathetic, and unmemorable.

Seeing most of them die was intense and awesome to watch.