Review of Hitman: Agent 47 (2015) by Lee F — 02 Nov 2015

A pathetic, re-attempt at bringing the iconic video game character to the big screen with an even dumber plot than the last film and some of the worst special effects I've seen in a modern, action film in quite some time.

The new actor playing Agent 47, Rupert Friend, does an okay job at looking the part, but he's barely given anything to do, and for a large portion of the film is actually portrayed as the villain, hunting a man and woman a la, The Terminator.

Once the film shifts and the woman discovers that he's actually trying to protect her, it becomes nearly a carbon-copy of the original film with only minor differences. The story is completely uninteresting with a recycled plot you feel you've seen a million times and Zachary Quinto's, antagonist role is basically a cyborg with synthetic skin who can't be killed by bullets/knives and he just can't deliver a menacing performance.

For some un-godly reason, the studio hired a music video director to helm the film and the same goddamn, terrible, shit-fuck writer from the last film, Skip Woods, who's literally the worst screenwriter in Hollywood and has delivered us such gems as X-Men Origins: Wolverine, Die Hard 5, Sabotage, and The A-Team.

..good choice guys. This film is almost nothing like the source material video game with tons of over-blown shoot-outs/car chases and features next to no stealth whatsoever; only mirroring the video games with his changing of disguises.

There is some enjoyment to be had in some of the over-the-top death scenes as the film is gleefully R-rated and shows you every bit of it, but on the other hand, nearly every car crash/explosion/stunt is 100% computer generated and it looks TERRIBLE.

This film is further proof that video games belong on their respective consoles and this series needs to be laid to rest.