Review of G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (2009) by Isaacm — 07 Aug 2009

What a terrible movie. Bad writing and horrible acting. I actually wanted duke to die just so I wouldn't have to put up with the unbelievably bad line delivery his actor gave. It was like he was locked in a room full of various amphetamines for hours before each shoot, every day, the drugs building up in his brain damaging his speech cortex and making his acting even worse.

Oh and "Commander" is played by that kid from Angels In The Outfield, making this the pansiest cobra commander my childhood can comprehend. Then they give him a facemask to make him look tough, but he just looks like the combine soldiers from half-life in a semi-clear mask with gene simmon's hairline etched into it.

And I won't even both with mrs. fickle mcswinger (nee love interest).