Review of Ghost Story (1981) by Jennifer O — 24 Feb 2005

[b][color=red]GHOST STORY[/color][/b] is one of those movies I saw and loved as a kid on late night TV or cable and remembered fondly for many years. It had been so many years in fact, that I seem to have remembered a movie which does not exist. The movie I remember was scary, haunting, beautiful and seemingly perfect, but this one was far from that. I enjoyed it because there are more positives than negatives, but I am very disappointed.

They use classic Hollywood actors in order to class it up a bit. We have [b]Fred Astaire, Douglas Fairbanks Jr., Melvyn Douglas and John Houseman[/b] as [b]The Chowder Society[/b], a group of 4 distinguished, elderly gents who get together everymonth to tell a [b]GHOST STORY. ([/b]Did you notice how I worked the title in there? OMG--I AM BRILLIANT!!!! BRILLIANT I SAY!!! ) We know something is wrong with this innocent little game because when the movie opens we see that these men are tormented by a nightmare from their past.

The film moves clumsily from once scene to the next and the writing is also pretty bad. For example:

[b]DAVID:[/b] [i]Who are you?[/i].

[b]Woman: [/b][i]Sleeping.[/i].

[b]DAVID:[/b] [i]Who are you?[/i].

[b]Woman:[/b][i] Woke me.[/i].

[b]DAVID:[/b][i] Tell me![/i].

[b]Woman:[/b][i] David[/i].

[b]DAVID:[/b] [i]Who are you.[/i].

[b]Woman:[/b] [i]You know. [/i].

[b]DAVID:[/b][i] I know?[/i].

[b]Woman:[/b] [i]I am you. [/i].

[i](David reaches out and touches her back lightly.) [/i].

[b]DAVID:[/b][i] No[/i]. [i](Looks at hand, puzzled.)[/i] [i]Cold.[/i].

[b]DAVID:[/b] [i]What are you? [/i].

[i]Screams ensue. Crash. Quick shot of a penis flopping about. Another crash. A boom. Some male buttocks. Blood.[/i].

So yeah, disappointing. David was related to one of the old men and his death brings his brother, Don, back home. We soon learn that Don knew the mystery woman in David's life, and he spends the rest of the film ( at least the parts that aren't flashbacks) trying to find out who the woman really was and what she wants before more of them die.

[b]ALICE KRIGE[/b] (THE BORG QUEEN for you sci-fi geeks) is wonderful as Alma (Eva). She is beautiful, sexy, and haunting at the same time. Some of the scenes of her with Don are really done well. She is creepy and sexy. (And we see her boobies a few times, and her buttocks, so yeah, you'll get to see some goodness. THAT'S ALL YOU THINK ABOUT, ISN'T IT? :p ).

The flashback scene where we see the old men as 20 somethings is too damned long and the actors are bland and pretty meh. It should have been much briefer, but I suppose they were trying to put some meat in the story.

The scenes I hated most involved the Bate brothers, a psychotic duo who help Alma torment the old men. Terrible acting. TERRIBLE.

The lack of genuine scares and suspense is regrettable. A ghost story, and a movie about a ghost story, should most certainly be scary and this was not. There were a few attempted jump scares, and some nice special effects for the time, but darn it, we needed some creepiness in here. It can be done people. Ever seen [b]THE CHANGELING[/b]? It can be done. We can get scared with very little gore at all.

Anyway, I'm talking too much and saying very little. See it once if you must, if only to ogle Krige's boobies, but don't buy it on a whim.