Review of Everything, Everything (2017) by Rachel M — 04 Mar 2018

This is kinda like that new Taylor Swift song, just don't even press the play button. This movie got so much hype so I decided I would give it a shot. It was given way too much hype for what it is. Spoiler alert: the storyline of this basic-ass, middle school girl, romance movie (and tbh maybe don't even read this cuz you're wasting more and more time on a movie that I hope you don't watch):

Sick, naive girl with over-protective, selfish mother keeps her trapped in the house for the first 18 years of her life, cute boy moves in next door, can't control themselves, she risks her life for this boy next door, they text and look at each other through their bedroom windows (which conveniently face each other), she gets a credit card and they run off to Hawaii together, they say "i love you", have a not-so-steamy, awkward-angled sex scene, she almost dies because she's sick and should be at home doing book reviews, HOLYSHIT she finds out she's not sick like her batshit crazy mother said she was (just an under-developed immune system), she leaves her mom, and cute neighbor boy and her run through the street together smiling.

That was such an awful run-on sentence, but this whole movie was an awful run-on sentence, written by a confused and bored middle-schooler girl.