Review of Drive (2011) by Brett S — 20 Oct 2013

What do car chases, gun fights, murder, and fast-paced action all have in common? Well, a lot of movies have that, to be honest, but apparently they all tried have Ryan Gosling in common. I was halfway through film school, and it was January of 2012, and I sat with my friends watching the 84th Academy Awards. As the celebrities gave speeches accepting their awards, and all the glamor and glitz wore off, the only thing that people in my film circles could talk about is how it was such a shame that Drive didn't get nominated for literally every single thing. "It was so deep!" they protested, "So artsy and raw! How could they not nominate it for something besides sound mixing?! It's insulting.".

Everybody and their dog liked Drive, but apparently I was the odd man out. I remember having rented the film and sitting down over winter break without having so much as seen a preview for the film alongside my family, excited to watch this critically acclaimed film recommended to me by so many friends. What followed were 100 minutes of what I considered to be pure agony.

Let me get this out of the way. I like Ryan Gosling. I think he's a decent actor. I've got nothing against the guy whatsoever, notwithstanding the massive crush every girl I know has on him because of the Notebook... which I still haven't seen, and don't plan on watching any time soon. I digress.

I'll start with the positives. It had a strong cast. Ron Perlman, Albert Brooks, Christina Hendricks, Carey Mulligan, Bryan Cranston, and Gosling... what's not to want? In preparation for this hindsight-review, I read through a plot synopsis to refamiliarize myself with the film, and watched the trailer again. What a great plot that got lost in the details! The trailer advertised this film as a fast-paced action-packed drama, promising that it would be great. As history has told us, trailers don't always tell the truth.

What really irked me about this movie wasn't the plot. It wasn't the acting. It was a combination of two things; pacing and soundtrack. For something advertised as an action movie (which, again, I didn't really know until after I'd seen the film), this is the slowest-paced action movie of all time. Please, director, have just one more shot of Gosling staring off into the distance while driving for five minutes of screen time. No, really. I just want to stare at his baby-blues a bit longer. This gimmick was used multiple times throughout the movie, trying to suggest his character deep in thought, when in reality, all it did was bring any momentum from the plot to a screeching halt.

Speaking of screeching, what was the thing my friends loved best about Drive? The soundtrack. Guess what part of the movie I couldn't stand the most? (Spoiler alert: Gosling is a real human being... and a real hero.) When Guy-Manuel de Homem-Christo of Daft Punk collaborates on one song, you'd think it would be better. His song was good, minus the vocal part, where the singer sounded like emphysema-man talking through a vocoder. But the song that bothered me most, frankly, was "A Real Hero" by College, featuring Electric Youth. They must've played that song a dozen times. It was probably the most repetitive thing I've ever heard in my life, and totally killed any mood in the on-screen action.

Am I maybe being a little unreasonable here? Perhaps. But I stand by it. There's some good things going on in Drive, sure. But I just couldn't possibly be bothered to subject myself to rewatching it again, such was my negative reaction to it during the first viewing. They should've titled it Drive... Me Insane.