Review of Don't Go Near the Park (1979) by Ruben A — 04 Apr 2012

I skimmed parts of this on youtube for a couple minutes. total cheese festival.& bad acting.& oh my God a funny minute where bondi is talking to nick!

Review: well...what we have here is a...something special.

Well where to begin...

Don't Go Near The Park, is definitely in the so bad its bad category. the gore is cheesy and laughable. the plot makes no sense. the pacing is rather bad, and the film's staccato feel doesnt make it any better, the editing is on the spot awful. some dialogue is just terrible, and many different subplots just dont hold well, and keep stumbling on each other. the acting is ok from some, and just straight up horrendous from most others. the use of stop motion for the aging process isnt very good, and looks rather phony. But you can tell this was meant to be a serious film. the script in its own just isnt funny enough for it top be an intentionally bad film like ive seen people say before. it just isnt quite right. the film somehow ended up on the video nasties I dont at all understand why.

I feel as though if it had a bigger budget it would be much better, and couldve been taken more seriously.

The climax, well the whole movie is just something else. I do wonder what drugs the film makers were on during filming...

The scoring...let me put it this way, the film feels and with the score sounds like I was watching the wizard of oz, only a rated r horror film. it just doesnt work.

The scene with the rapists, I mean who on earth is that stupid? and Bondi somehow makes it out perfectly fine with no real explanation.

The plot summary on Flixster literally is telling the whole movie, its something you have to see to believe.

Avid horror fans may recognize a young Linnea Quigley in her apparent first film.