Review of Diary of the Dead (2007) by Jordan V — 05 May 2009

So Romero wanted to go with something different with Diary of the Dead. Adopting the 'Blair Witch' style of filming, made widely famous by recent big budget movies like 'Quarantine' and 'Cloverfield', the 'Diary' attempts to portray a group of film students who are stranded during the onset of the apocalypse and decide to document their attempts to survive as they travel amidst a nation thrown into chaos by the zombie phenomenon so prominent in Romero's films.

I'd first like to apologize as I feel this review will come off as extremely negative, even though that was not it's intention, I wouldn't have bought it if I didn't enjoy it enough to do so, this is just everything I have to say about the film.

While the premise is intriguing, it isn't as convincing as one might have hoped. For one thing, most all of the characters, save the professor who's a bit old and one homely looking girl who is quickly killed off toward the beginning of the film, are very good looking people. While this doesn't, at first mention, seem like something unusual for a film birthed by the fantasy world of Hollywood it did manage to detract from the sense of immersion that should be felt throughout a documentary-style film. Not that I'm complaining mind you, the reasons for the casting are obvious and it worked rather well on myself as well as anyone, there are some seriously good looking women in this picture. It's just difficult to buy the idea that the group of students who decided to make a documentary about the zombie apocalypse just happen to all be good looking people. It should feel realistic and gritty, but it just doesn't, and this is partially because not everyone on the cast is strictly up to the task of conveying the drama of their situation (or screenplay for that matter). The professor is one notable exception however, his drunken and philosophical banter serving as a welcome addition in any scene. The problem with recruiting hot young actors to dominate your cast is that they tend to come off as hot young actors and not the characters they're supposed to be playing. This is, truly, the film's greatest weakness as it pops the suspension of disbelief bubble almost immediately.

It wasn't just the cast who bothered me but also the characters they're supposed to play. As I said before, the professor is the coolest character in the film, and is not only the most entertaining character but also proves himself to be a phenomenal badass by the end. So he's good. Not all of the cast is completely pointless either, a couple of the dudes show they don't have trouble blowing a zombie's head off or running a zombie through with an IV-Stand when the situation calls for it, and the blond from Texas flaunts not only beauty but also aptitude for the automotive, fixing their RV after it breaks down in one scene. My main gripe comes with the guy behind the camera. This guy is totally worthless. I understand, were it not for his stubborn obsession with filming EVERYTHING, there would be no film but his persistence is such that you want to ring his neck more than once before the movie is over. Anyone who's spent time around real film students will see all of their bad qualities, and none of their good ones, in the camera man. He's a narcissistic bastard who almost allows a zombie to eat his friend alive in one scene, just so he can film it. If that doesn't piss you off, you don't want to know what I think of you.

There are also some effects sequences that are effectively convincing aesthetically, but physically implausible. A gun that inexplicably never runs out of ammo, being one example. I understand that the characters could have reloaded the weapon in between scenes but at least a shot showing a box of ammo lying on the table would have offered something other than the bottomless magazine theory. Certain improvised weapons seem to pass almost effortlessly through undead flesh and bone, one can not help but wonder if our hot young "film students" possess superhuman strength. Things like this can sometimes make the film feel a bit manufactured. None of the flaws ruin the experience outright but they can add up if you look closely enough.

Aside from that the film still manages a commentary on current events and world issues of the time, like all Romero films. This comes off quite nicely and the idea of zombies serving as means to educate us on the human condition is something that can never really get old, for fans of the genre at least. The one thing to which I'll never be able to relate is the morality angle. Once someone has been reanimated as a zombie they are no longer alive and no longer human, not like an animal, which is alive, so how could anything done to zombies possibly be interpreted as immoral or inhumane? I just don't get it. It's like being served a flat glass of soda pop.

Overall, I would still rank this as a typical zombie movie. A few different things do manage to separate the film from the droning of other such works, but it is, overall the same flavor as most everything else we've yet seen. It's just filmed from a different angle.