Review of Death Bed: The Bed That Eats (1977) by Heather K — 27 Apr 2008

Well...the title is intriguing right? If the title doth intrigue and thou art a fan of the ridiculous, and seventies independent films...then please proceed. If you think this looks stupid, you will hate it that much I am sure of. Amusingly this film actually began being made in 1972, but didn't finish until 1977, then wasn't actually released until 2003...pretty insane huh? Well this may not be a lost "classic" but it's a classic of some kind for bad yet strangely entertaining cinema.

The plot is pretty much non-existent. There is a gothic looking bed in this old castle which eats things. For some odd reason people keep turning up and sleeping in this bed (or trying to have sex in it) and it eats. How does it eat? Well first we see yellow bubbly foam around the object (and or person), then a shot of "inside the bed" which is all yellow bubbly water and then shots of the item being devoured pieced together in the water. It's actually done a little better than I've made it sound, but yet it's somehow entirely undescribable.

What makes this so entertaining is the fact that this bed doesn't just eat people, it eats Pepto Bismol (seriously), an apple (it even coughs up the core) and it drinks wine....among many other things. What's annoying here is that there is some plot about a soul trapped in a picture of a guy the bed couldn't eat who narrates this darned picture. That actually keeps it from being better than it could be with simply the bed eating things. Still I'm sure by now you know if you want to see it or not. I found it to be quite the novelty but not exactly something I'm going to rush out and buy.