Review of Cool World (1992) by Jamie T — 07 Jun 2011

That WHO FRAMED ROGER RABBIT is one of my favorite films may have partially induced me to see this as such a piece of shit, but there's so much more to it than that. COOL WORLD is one of the biggest trainwrecks in mainstream filmmaking that I've ever seen, and even if one acknowledges that the studio likely interfered with Ralph Bakshi's realization of his "vision", the film's fundamental wretchedness still shines through. What makes it all the more aggravating are the flashes of interest throughout that show the potential the film had. But the ineptitude of the direction, writing, and editing render it a failure in cinematic terms, while the poor acting renders it a failure in dramatic terms.

The story involves a young veteran, Frank Harris (Brad Pitt) who is catapulted into "Cool World", a cartoon universe where the main celebrity is the Marilyn Monroe-ish vixen Holli Would (Kim Basinger); flash ahead 50 years, and cartoonist Frank Deebs (Gabriel Byrne) is about to be released from prison. Deebs believes he has created Cool World, and is in love with Holli Would; we then discover that she has somehow (key word) transported him there from time to time. This doesn't sit well with Harris, who has become the main law enforcement figure in Cool World, defending the single significant law: doodles (cartoons) do not have sex with noids (humans); this despite Harris' having a doodle girlfriend, a relationship he cannot consummate.

Naturally, Holli eventually succeeds in seducing Deebs (who has already discovered that Cool World was not his creation), which turns her into a noid, after which she and Deebs escape into our world (Las Vegas, to be exact), and she seeks a magical spike that will cement her human status, since she and Deebs both seem to be fluctuating between noid and doodle status. Chaos, intentional or not, ensues.

The film's greatest saving grace is its animation. A wide variety of manic characters populate the film, from the wily old doctor "Vegas Vinnie" (Maurice LaMarche) who first linked the two worlds, or Harris' cheerful spider-partner, Nails (Charlie Adler)--who is easily the most likable character in the whole film. But annoying or underdeveloped though many of the characters are, there's some zest to them, namely that particular brand of early 90s faux-underground animation that eventually was tamed and featured on Nickelodeon and Cartoon Network. But the characters also come off as awkward (the pacing in the film is horrendous), and the screen is frequently filled with random animated chaos that seems included to mask the lousiness of the scene in progress. Also, when noids are in Cool World, the sets take on the appearance of painted flats and backdrops, a semi-theatrical effect that is, at least, unique.

The script by Michael Grais and Mark Victor reputedly was a total bastardization of Bakshi's original concept, and it is certainly a bastardization of quality in screenwriting. The jokes are lame, the characters barely extant, and the story is an utter mess. The idea that doodles and noids cannot mate feels like nothing more than a plot contrivance, while the matter of the magic spike is so badly handled as to make no sense at all.

Bakshi's direction is dire. Scenes are frequently horribly awkward, and the animation/live-action mix is hideously bungled. Characters often stand around with little to do, the result being some baffling pauses; iit plays even worse than it sounds. The live-action sequences are actually fairly decent, even if they lack distinction. Bakshi's unhappiness with the mangled script and studio interference is palpable throughout, and COOL WORLD is a laughably awful experience.

The acting doesn't help at all. Basinger is petulant and irritating as a doodle, and simply embarassing as a noid. She dresses like a clown and acts tiresomely infantile, alienating us and robbing the "noid" Holli of any allure. That she ultimately gets some comeuppance at the end at least dispels the idea that we are meant to like her. Pitt is a fine actor, and his performance as Harris is the least shitty of the main three, but he generally seems bored with the role, and justifiably so. Gabriel Byrne doesn't even bother to act, and Deebs is as uncompelling a major character as I've ever seen in a film. He doesn't intrigue, he doesn't inspire, he doesn't do ANYTHING; it is a bad performance indeed. The voice acting is intermittently decent, but nothing noteworthy.

COOL WORLD is one of the worst films I've seen in a long time, being remarkably inept in nearly every way. At least its wretchedness is compelling; I was not really bored by the film, and bad-movie lovers should find some pleasure in it. But it really is a disaster.