Review of Captain Blood (1935) by Tom A — 14 Jan 2008

If I was in a war I'd like to be Gregory Peck, if I was in prison I'd like to Charles Bronson and if I was in a nightmarish post apocalyptic world of scrub land and bleak moors populated with roving war-bands of savage hairy men I'd like to be a monosyllabic Sean Connery resplendent in a fetching pair of orange pants.

But if I was a pirate I'd be Errol Flynn and call myself Captain Bile or Pancreatic Juices or some other evocative bodily fluid and then sail the tropical seas nobly robbing evil Royal fleets. I would pass the time bedding the Governor's daughter, running my sharp rapier through lecherous Frenchmen, winning the utter devotion of my motley crew and generally being so darn dashing that the punctuation mark "-" would be renamed after me.

This film is that good.