Review of Blair Witch (2016) by Clem666 — 27 Apr 2021

It is a true challenge to release another sequel to the 1999 movie. To launch it they obviously had to make connexions with this last movie. So we follow James' story who wants to find back her sister Heather, the heroine of 'The Blair Witch Project'. Does he really think she survived in this cursed forest for something like five years ?

This movie takes back the good old roots of the first feature but adds even more technology in it: the amount of hi-tech equipment the team has is just overwhelming. They have a drone, a dozen of high-quality and night cameras, knives and several GPS systems among others. Because yes, in this movie you are about to witness a bunch of amateurs successfully making fly a drone in the middle of a dense forest. Yeah why not. Obviously this famous drone will crash and lead to a horribly predictable scene later in the plot. Obviously the characters have to record and film everything they see and do including a lot of very boring tasks like interviews, arguments, terrible jokes and tents assembly. Obviously the beginning has to show the protagonists drinking alcohol and taunting each other. Obviously the final cut has to gather some weird shots punctuated by way too many cuts and freezes so that some scenes honestly become confusing and impossible to understand. Obviously this great equipment must stop working in the worst scenes and moments. Obviously the protagonists always have to constantly choose to split up in order to die and make the plot move on. Obviously the camera lenses, flashlights and batteries remain intact from beginning to the end despite all the events. In addition to it all characters obviously had to be caricatures of themselves.

In overall there are a lot of parts of it looking just like a video game. Charatcres control the drone with a hi-tech tablet, there are several scenes we see that are filmed in first person view, and the general pace makes the events go crescendo, just like the 'Outlast' games. The panting noises during the whole film quickly become unbearable. At the end of the tunnel, the ending scenes see the events coming to the apex and becoming way too incoherent, dizzy and confusing, making the whole movie look like a huge assemblage of typical horror movie ingredients mixed with few common sense. Even if some scenes are iconic and appear to be truly effective this doesn't erase the drafty plot process and the many unexplained and dull scenes.