Review of Black Christmas (2006) by David C — 26 Aug 2009

While the title makes you think this is an ethnic movie about the celebration of Jesus' bday, this is a remake of a horror movie from the 1970's, a time when the world lived in black and white other than when people were walking around with enormous bongs (so I hear).

Once there was enough marijuana content in the sky from the 1960's and 1970's, the world turned to technicolor and with the recent popularity of medical marijuana, we are now living in full 1080P HD. Thank you, 1960's and 1970's.

Black Christmas is yet another movie that depends on gross imagery and visual shock factor instead of actual "scary," which is one of my biggest peeves in modern horror movies (looking at you, Rob Zombie and Eli Roth). The killer likes to use black Hefty bags (GET IT?!?! BLACK CHRISTMAS!!! kidding, I don't really know why it's called Black Christmas) to kill people, which is kind of terrifying because all of us have seen those "choking hazard" warnings on bags before, but we never think it can happen to us. IT CAN! And it will, on Christmas.

Black Christmas.

One of the redeeming parts of this movie is Katie Cassidy, who is probably the hottest girl in a horror movie in a rong rong time. While she is not the "I'm going to get naked so I can die" girl, she is definitely much more worthy of being a Hollywood crush than she gets credit for.

If you're looking for a new crush, give Black Christmas a whirl in the good ole' Betamax. If you're set with your herem of Hollywood wimmenz, good to mosey along past Black Christmas, which will not be one of your family's holiday favorites unless your family likes playing weird tricks on each other.