Review of Bad Boys II (2003) by Peter O — 05 Jun 2010

Between Bad Boys and Bad Boys II, director Michael Bay lost all sense of what is a reasonable way to handle a movie.

Much like last year's Transformers 2, BB2 is much longer than it has any right to be. You'd think that, at two and a half hours, the movie would have some epic story which demanded a comprehensive retelling. Unfortunately, the film's length is due to the need to wrap up the loose ends of a subplot about Martin Lawrence's erectile dysfunction.

I'll admit that there is a pretty awesome chase/explosion scene not too far into the movie, but even while watching I was acutely aware of the major problem. As I said aloud: "Oh no... the rest of the movie can't live up to this scene." Damn my powers of prognostication!

I'm tempted to say that BB2 was better than its predecessor, if only because the first movie had a plot out of countless sitcoms while the second movie is decidedly more cinematic. More summer blockbuster fun. But I keep coming back to the unjustified length. There's no hilarious body-switching going on in this movie, but Will Smith has a crush on Martin Lawrence's sister... who is also a law enforcement official! Wacky drug-running hijinx ensue. And two too many "above-ground pool falling apart" jokes.

I don't have much to say about this movie. Mainly the ED subplot is what I wanted to tell you about. Smith and Lawrence are both terrible cops - I sort of wish the movie would take that more seriously, but they manage to destroy public and private property haphazardly without so much as a warning from their higher-ups. But I guess as long as people aren't selling drugs, any amount of destruction is understandable. Right?

Yeah, neither of the Bad Boys movies are very good.