Review of 10,000 BC (2008) by Alexander D — 09 Oct 2011

Roland Emmerich takes a break from apocalyptic disaster films (well, for one film; we see the release of 2012 a year after this) to direct a ho-hum disaster of an Ice Age-set film.

There's so much wrong with 10,000 B.C. There's the narration, to start with. It sounds like a Native American reading out of a textbook he found in a time capsule. And with all the historical inaccuracies that are practically shouting, "Hey, Historian! Look at me!" (Not that you even have to be a historian to be able to notice them--another big issue.).

Oh, and then there's the whole idea of it. If you want to combine a chick flick with a movie about survival and hunting, that's clearly an automatic "N-O". But clearly poor Roland Emmerich did not know that when he created this film, a love story set over twelve-thousand years ago. Sorry, but it just doesn't work.

There is one good thing about this film, though, that saves it from becoming a total bomb: the visual effects. They're stunning, as usual for the man behind THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW and INDEPENDENCE DAY, and the costumes and make-up, too, are something to applaud for.

But what's to applaud for if you don't even see it? Please take my word and do not see it, as it is underwhelming, redundant, and (forgetting the dazzling visual work) dull, without a good enough story line for an entire feature length.